For the last few years I have chosen a Bible verse to apply to the new year. In late 2015, I came across a verse that little did I know, would consume my entire being.

2015 was a great year, but I don’t recall much of it. I was pretty much a living mom zombie. It was the year of TIRED. I had so much intention, but no energy to take on my ever-growing to-do list.

I wasn’t searching for my 2016 verse, but prayed continuously for guidance on tackling everyday life. I don’t know about y’all but even all the ordinary things became difficult to overcome. How fitting that God sent me a verse so life-giving, that it basically jumped from the pages of Proverbs, straight in to my heart.

Proverbs 31:27
She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Gut punch. Thanks Father, you basically just called me lazy. You know that feeling when someone calls you out and then you get defensive. Yeah, I couldn’t do that. Not with him. He knows my heart. So instead of dwelling in my shortcomings. I held tight to those words.

I can’t tell you how many times I said it out loud, how many times I looked at it on my desk, and wrote it in my notebooks.

I had to let it marinate. I didn’t really know what God wanted me to do with it, or how to let it help me.

When you truly meditate on the Word of God, it speaks to you. The words may be the same on paper, but the Spirit delivers it to you in such a way that helps and heals you. When I feel these words, God isn’t calling me lazy.

He is telling me, I have purpose. I have much to do.

The beginning of the verse states “she looks well.” Looks, present tense, continuously. To look is to observe, to focus, and to notice. Ok God, I hear you, calling me to put the distraction away and look. I learned so much about my family, when I cleared the distractions, and focused. We can miss so much, by being distracted. I will never forget a post circulating Facebook last year involving a mom that decided to put her phone down for an hour to see how many times her children looked to her for direction, approval, and guidance. I cannot recall the exact number, but it was many times over. Can you imagine, so many missed opportunities to build up our husbands and children!

I was overtaken with guilt, but as we know, we can only move forward and forward I went, with my verse.

Sophia, my little loud bundle of joy, will never let you ignore her needs. Jaidyn, is my quiet soul. Jaidyn, like Derrick, hides her hurt and disappointment. For so long I was missing Jaidyn’s cues that she needed me. Either I was missing it completely or I wasn’t digging deep enough.

Story time: Earlier this year Jai was being ignored by a classmate. I attempted to teach her the hard lesson that not everyone wants to be your friend. Jai wasn’t having that. It hurt me to see Jai try to convience someone that she was worth knowing. One day she came home and requested extra chores in an attempt to purchase a Monster High book. I told her no initially and lectured her because she hadn’t finished her last book. The look on her face was more than just disappointment from not buying a book. Later that night, I asked her why this book was so important to her and she let me know that it was the favorite book of the girl who didn’t want to be her friend. It was common ground, to build a friendship on. Oh.

I almost missed this. I can’t believe I almost dismissed it.

Spoiler: A month later, this loving and patient daughter of mine gained a real friendship. The same child who ignored Jai… when asked who she was thankful for, stood up in class and said “Jaidyn”.

When you “look well” you’re able to love your tribe better.

The last part of the verse was to not eat the bread of idleness.

The Bible says so much about laziness. Again, after letting this dwell, I refused to wear that label. Instead I took this as encouragement.

How can you be idle, when I have promised you so much?

Half of my to-do list was not being accomplished not because I didn’t have time or intent. But because my old habits were preventing me from being the woman my family needed me to be!

I read an amazing book titled The Power of Habit that opened my eyes to my old habits and a way to reprogram new ones.

One of the of suggestions the book gives, is to be aware of the cue that begins your routine. For me that was my couch. Honey, I would grab a coffee and as soon as my bum hit that couch, there went my whole day. So what did I do? I got rid of that cue. I got rid of my couch. Drastic right? Well, I needed drastic. I needed change.

My brain started freaking out because it didn’t go into habit mode aka preservation mode, and had to work hard to build new habits. Once I came home, I didn’t sit down. I would drink my coffee while tackling my to-do list.

I thought to myself, if I can change my old habit, then I can for sure build amazing habits in my littles.

So with time I have been able to instill a routine of productiveness. Come home, feed dog, play with dog, do homework, have snack, play, reading, more play, dinner, bath, read some more, sleep.

Once those healthy habits are in place, they become instilled in you.

Guess what happened when some of those habits were formed… I didn’t have to ask or remind them as much and extra bonus…I yell less.

When these habits formed, we now have time for more walks, more Uno after dinner, more cuddles on the couch.

Don’t get me wrong, there are still tears, pouting, and temper tantrums, but not nearly as bad than before. They are now aware of their role in this family. Through me refusing to remain idle, my children have learned that they have greater things to do too.

Friends, I have learned that we are made to rejoice in doing. Our hearts were not made to remain idle but to be awaken and proactive in the loving of our tribe.

Please share the scripture that has encouraged you in this year, I would love to hear it.

Your friend,

Rosa